ChaCha Chang
by Sirius and Fred Live On
Summary: Chang goes nuts. Or does she? Hmmm. Read to discover! By Bridgette.


**Cha-Cha Chang**

Disclaimer: I do not own any characters; they are JK Rowling's. I only own the plot. Please don't sue me for it.

"Hey, Chang!" Pansy Parkinson's voice trilled into the muggy stillness of the early June air.

"What?" Cho asked cheerfully. She hated Pansy, but nothing could bring her down today. It was Monday. _Good day_, Cho thought. _I like the groggy, beginning-of-the-new-very-boring-going-to-die-school-week feeling._

"I'm having an amazing day! Guess what happened!" Pansy sneered in Cho's face. Cho simply grinned.

"What happened?" She asked, skipping in a circle. She giggled, not caring that she was making a complete fool of herself in front of everyone.

"I snogged Michael Corner after Charms. You know the one; your boyfriend." Pansy bragged off-handedly, trying extra hard to make Cho burst into tears.

"That's nice! I don't care!" Cho smiled brightly. _What an idiot,_ Pansy thought disdainfully.

"You should. He's cheating on you." Pansy curled her hands into fists in anger.

"I like pickles." Cho said randomly. Pansy stared at her as if she'd gone mad. Cho seemed not to have noticed that her boyfriend was cheating on her. She examined her long, eggplant coloured fingers giddily. She noticed a small child watching her amusedly. "Ka-ching!"

"God, get psychological help, Chang." Pansy rolled her eyes dramatically before walking away, angry that she had failed at getting a rise out of the Human Water Hydrant.

Cho was walking along peacefully, completely minding her own business when she was stopped abruptly by something solid. She fell to the ground, breaking her elbow in the process. She grinned up at the man who had walked into her.

"Hello, Harry! Sorry I hit you. Are you hurt?" Cho asked happily as Harry examined her arm. He looked away from her elbow, into her eyes, confused.

"Er, no, but you broke your elbow." He told her, as if she didn't already know this valuable information.

"Why, yes, it appears I did." Cho alleged gleefully. She stood up and merrily punched Harry in the stomach. When he stumbled back against the wall, she grabbed his collar and snogged him senseless. When they pulled apart, she waved to him in flourish. "See you around, Harry!"

"Er, yeah." Came his dumbfounded reply. _Dumb? No, Harry was really quite bright. What are you on about? Merlin, you don't even know your own topic? Hey, don't insult me! ARGH!_

"SUNSHINE, DAISIES!" Cho sang loudly at an innocent, bystanding 1st year. They always were extremely pompous. God.

"I like jumping jacks!" Cho yelled in a panicked voice. In the middle of Transfiguration.

"Pardon me, Miss Chang?" Professor Magonagal asked in a scandalized tone. Her nostrils flared angrily at Cho for interrupting her.

"You could swallow a Rhino with nostrils like those! Holy Humugo!" Cho exclaimed in astonishment.

"MISS CHANG!" The Transfiguration teacher yelled. Cho smiled pleasantly.

"Professor, be reasonable! They really are enormous. Would you like a Birthday card? I have plenty!" Cho informed her amiably. Amiably. Ha. Funny word. Too many 's' for Cho's liking, though. A better one would be 'Sassafras'. Or 'sassy'. Not a single 's'.

"Oh, for Merlin's sake!" Professor Magonagal shouted in a helpless tone. Cho decided to kick Padma Patil in the rear for the rest of class. Life was full of small joys.

Professor Snape stormed into Potions in a terribly foul mood. Cho Chang trailed behind him just seconds after he entered the room with a goofy grin on her face.

"So, professor, if you ever need to know which Hair Cleansing Potion works the best, it's Slimy Shish Kebab Shampoo!" She called after him ecstatically. "Remember why? It's the pork! It helps - "

"ENOUGH!" Snape yelled at her, showering her face with slimy grease from his hair. " We have been over this a million times! I DON'T CARE!"

"Alright, but Cockroach Cluster sure helps a bad bout of the Chicken Pox, you know." Cho said sadly. Snape stared at her blankly.

"What? Weren't we talking about hair?" He flicked pork from his hair at her in reminder.

"Were we?" Cho looked exceedingly worried. She smiled suddenly, making Snape jump back in surprise. "Would you like a pop tart?"

"Yes!" Snape said in pleasant surprise. No one had ever offered him anything before. He took a huge bite of the one she handed him. "ARGH! PORK!"

The students of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry were eating a quiet lunch of Crayfish and Broccoli when Cho Chang burst through the doors of the Great Hall. Everyone turned to stare, waiting for the latest nutcase thing she would do. Cho ran up to the Heads Table ostrich-style and jumped onto it like a bud on a windshield. She stood up and looked around approvingly.

"It is time for a song!" She declared in a manly voice. She turned to Dumbledore and sang:

"When the night won't fall and the sun won't rise  
And you see the best as you close your eyes  
When you reach the top as you bottom out  
But you understand what it's all about"

She jumped down from the table and broke into the funky chicken. The whole schools swayed as it sang:

"Nothing's ever what it seems  
In your life or in your dreams  
It don't make sense, what can you do  
So I won't try makin' sense of you

Love just is... whatever it may be  
Love just is... you and me  
Nothing less and nothing more  
I don't know what I love you for... love just is"

Cho grabbed Draco Malfoy out of his seat and dragged him onto the Heads Table to dance slowly. He didn't object. She was hot, even if she was psychotic. The began waltzing as the students sang:

"When you ask to stay and then disappear  
It seems you're gone but you're really here  
When every move seems out of place  
But every kiss is filled with grace"

Cho dropped Malfoy into a deep dip at the lull in the music. She kissed him full on the lips. They flailed awkwardly for a moment before straightening up to dance again. They sang along with the other students:

"Some things never get defined  
In your heart or in your mind  
It don't make sense, what can you do  
So I won't try makin sense of you

Love just is... whatever it may be  
Love just is... you and me  
Nothing less and nothing more  
I don't know what I love you for... love just is"

Cho and Malfoy did an amazing, synchronized Funky Chicken at Hagrid, who threw turkeys at them. Swinging the turkeys above they're heads, Cho and Malfoy levitated Professor Flitwick into a Crystal Chandelier.

"Don't ever ask me for reasons  
I can't get to you  
Don't ever ask me for reasons  
Why I live for you... I just do  
I just do

Nothing's ever what it seems  
In your life or in your dreams  
It don't make sense, what can you do  
So I won't try makin' sense of you"

Cho pointed her wand at the crowd and Ron Weasley suddeny floated in the air, pretending to be a duck.

"You don't make sense!" Cho screamed at him in frustration. She then stuck her wand up Professor Magonagal's extremely large nostril.

"Love just is... whatever it may be  
Love just is... you and me  
Nothing less and nothing more  
I don't know what I love you for... love just is"

Cho jumped down from the Heads Table and stood on Dean Thomas' pinky finger.

"I LOVE PICKLES!" She sand in an Opera voice before passing out and breaking her other elbow. Malfoy watched in horror as she bubbled, turning back into her original form. Her non-Polyjiuce Potion form. Fred Weasly.

AN: Please review! I love reviews! Even if they arent' good ones! Constructive criticism! Thank you! -Bridgette


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